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Sunday, March 19, 2006

I did not need to hear that

I was told by a fellow perspective adoptive friend that the wait at our agency might be as long as 18 months for an infant. WTF?! I am seriously thinking that if our wait for an infant is that long, i will have gone crazy in the time we would wait. I am scared to face a long wait like that. With domestic adoption, there is not telling how lnog the wait will be, but 18 months is on the long end of the wait time from what I have been told. Yikes.

I want to be able to remain confident that we will manage our lives ok with the wait time, no matter how long it takes. I am just scared we will be too anxious like we have already done with the fixing up of the nursey as noted below. I mean, did I jinx ourselves by doing this so quickly? Did we set ourselves up for being disappointed? Who knows, only time will tell of course. I know we have things to keep us busy and focused in the next month .... waiting for our finger prints to come back and then hopefully the OK that our home study is done and passed with approval, then we start our adoptive parenting classes the first thursday in APril for 5 weeks. So that will keep us busy. I am just anxious, nervous, scared, excited all bundled up in this body of mine and DH is feeling the same way.

We did say maybe we need to talk to the agency owner to calm our fears. I will try and email her this week to check on how things are going and if she heard back about our finger prints yet. 3.5 weeks since they were mailed off? or was it 2.5? I think it was 2.5 today. Hmmm. LOL. overly anxious, you bet!

camping was great this weekend. Chilly, but that is what a camp fire is for. Sure, we have a camping trailor so it is nice to sleep in, but we do spend lots of time outdoors enjoying the nature. Did you realize we have a camping site in the Greater Metropolitian area? Sure do, Babler State Park on the outskirts of Wildwood MO by Chesterfield MO. Beautiful park, great walking paths.. can't beat it. Sure, it might not be far for you, but for me, the city dweller, it is like being in the Country to me. That is a great place to go and actully be close enough to work so I don't have to take a full day of vacation time.

Speaking of vacation time.... I don't get paid leave for when we are placed with a baby from adoption. Nope. Dang it. So I am on the war path for fund raising. Might you have some fund raising ideas you can share with me? I am having a yard sale and am looking for donations of items so post to me here if you know of kids toys or items that might not be of use to you anymore, but you might consider donating our way. I am not a begger, but man this is hard to come up with at least 6 weeks of money to cover my pay at work. I would actually love to stay home 8 weeks if possible. I can take up to 12 weeks off work by FMLA, but it is not paid and my work is not willing to budge on that one. They'd cover me for 8 weeks if I had or would give birth physically, but since I won't give birth when adopting(hello, I can't have my own child physically), I won't get paid. We have funds, but most of them are being dedicated to the cost of the adoption process so I have to find creative ways to raise funds to at least have in the bank as extra to cover my income for those 6-8 weeks I will be at home bonding with our baby hopefully.

Any fundraising ideas would be so helpful.


1 comment:

Mich said...

Just to put it in perspective...we were told 18 months was an average wait, and we were matched in 4! Friends of ours (same agency) were matched in 6. So think positively, there have to be people on BOTH sides of that average!

I have to say it really irks me when an employer will pay you for birthing a child but not adopting one! I could rant for hours, but I won't. I will leave you with these fundraising tips, borrowed from a friend who did 2 international adoptions in 2 years:

1)sell a cookbook! She put together favorite recipes, got it copied and bound somewhere local (cheap or donated) and sold them for $10 thru our church.

2)have a bake sale! She also had a bake sale at a church festival, and make lots of $$--not becuase her brownies were overpriced, but nobody wanted change back b/c it was for a good cause!

I would definitely pool friends and families garage sales this year and post what you are raising $$ for at the sale.

I also have heard the Dave Thomas Foundation has good resources in getting employers to help out a little too.