About Us

Monday, October 31, 2005

3 is a good and lucky number

3 embies that is now residing in my 5 star condo....hehe

We had our hearts set on only putting back 2 embies, but after a good 10 minute discussion with Dr. A..... we went ahead and put back 3 health grade a 8 celled embies. Why you ask? Well when we did our last fresh IVF cycle in August last year with Dr. p... we put back 2 grade A 8 celled embies and did not get pg so we took Dr. A's advice and went with 3. I feel comfortable with that decision. I will hold onto hope that we will get one of those 3 to implant.

I have several others growing in the lab and should get a letter in the next few days on the idea if they were able to freeze a few or not. I am nervous, but am putting my hope in the hands of the 2 embryologists at Dr. A's office. Today we had the female embryologist hand over our catheter with the 3 beautiful embies to transfer. I think her name is jennifer. LOL.

I rested well after the transfer in the office and then came home to sleep for a good 3 hours after that. I am now on "Couch Potato" rest per Dr. A's instructions for 24 hours to come. LOL

Drinking lots of water. but for some reason, I can't get my hand out of the candy jar that DH is using to hand out candy to the wet and soggy trick-or-treaters. LOL Yup. they are out there.

Happy Halloween to my embies inside me and cheers to those in the lab trying hard to grow strong to be frozen.
I am off work tomorrow and will then go back to work Wed.

Next acupuncture appointment is tomorrow.

oh.. btw... we had to have my bladder tapped 2 times during this transfer. What a strange feeling.

oh yeah.. the phone just rang and had the RIGHT calller ID

We are to be at the office at 11:30 AM central time to pick up our babies.

I sure hope this 5 star condo is ready to pick up our babies and be the holder of them for another 8 months to come. One singleton would be nice.

Lord above hear our prayers.

until tomorrow. .....

tick tock.. tick tock

goes the clock... but wating the clock, it sure isn't making the dang phone ring any faster. LOL

I await that magical phone call to tell us if today is our transfer day or if we are to wait until Wednesday.

Fingers crossed for good news no matter what. I sure hope all of our 11 embies are growing strong. I hope and pray.

can you send some +++ vibes to the lab up on N New Ballas road?


Sunday, October 30, 2005

granted permission.... Nookie mentioned......

WARNING>> doing the duty, you know...... humping, metioned below<<<

Well, when in the recovery room after retrieval on Friday at SIRM St. Louis, the nice nurse came in to give us our discharge papers and instructions to get us to the day we are called for transfer to come in. Which by the way could be either tomorrow AM (Monday) for a 3 day xfer or Wednesday AM for a 5 day transfer. (btw, We have 11 beautiful embies growing in the lab!).... in those instructions we were told to have intercourse the night before the possible transfer. Soooo here is the senario and then I will talk about this issue of intercourse before the transfer.

Senario 1: If we are a go for a 3 day transfer Monday, my all so happy DH will get some NOOKIE tonight. Nope, I can't back out of it either since the doctor instructed this for our cycle. HA

Senario 2: No matter what, we must prep for Monday to be the transfer day, so Nookie is happening for us Sunday night (sure you need to know this, right?! bahahaha) BUT BUT BUT... if they call tomorrow and say no transfer for 3 day on Monday, come in Wednesday for a 5 day transfer..... well well well my DH will be a mighty happy camper in this household.... Why? because he will not only get NOOKIE Sunday night, but if we go to 5 day transfer instead he gets another INSTRUCTED round of NOOKIE Tuesday night too. OMG. He will be in heaven if that happens.

2 nookie sessions in one week possibly? huh? Really instructed by the doctor? (well the nurse actually, but you get the drift, right?) I mean DH will be loving every minute of it. My problem is that I just went through a VAGINAL retrieval of 19 eggs from these here ovaries. ALL I CAN SAY TO THAT IS OUCH and to add some nookie session or even two nookie sessions on top of that. OMG. PAIN... This DH of mine will be instructed by ME, the Wifey.... to be extra gentle and loving.

Well to discuss the theory behind the intercourse before transfer..... I asked the nurse why? She said Theory is that it can help get the uterus ready for implantation of the embies when put back in. IN A NORMAL COUPLES situation that don't need IVF like DH and I, Think of it this way, the sperm are in the uterus when the egg is in the tube as time passes then the left over sperm are in the uterus when the fertilized egg moves to the uterus to implant... so why not make it the most mimiced environment possible?! Yup.. That is how I think of it. LOL

Ok, not that you all need to know about your LOVE MAKING sessions, but I just had to jot this down. Interesting changes from the prior clinic we were with. LOL

Saturday, October 29, 2005

all vibes for good cleaving....

well after being very anxious today for THAT call to come in, you know... the call of fertilization rate..... I finally heard the phone ring today around 2:20 pm. WOW... that was a long morning and mid-day. But the sweet music and all telling caller-ID... I answered the happy phone call from SIRM St. Louis. COnnie was on the other end and asked How I was feeling. I told her Very anxious. hehe. Understandable. She said that yesterday we got 19 eggs and of those 19, 15 eggs were mature. Then the good news was that she said they embryologist confirmed today that we have 11 embryos growing strong in the lab. YEAH. Good cleaving vibes to our babies growing in the lab. (I thought we had 20 eggs, but that is ok.. it was a prelim report they gave me wheeling me out to the truck for DH to take me home)

Now comes the hard part. The WAIT. She told us to expect a call Monday AM (no specific time given, you know how hard that is to not know a time frame?) to get that call on whether we get to come in Monday for a day 3 embryo transfer or wait until Wednesday for day 5 transfer. I have mixed feelings about this issue. I want my embies back in me safe, but then again I want them healthy so if they make it to day 5 and blastocysts stage then we know for sure they are in great shape. SOOOOOO, the wait continues.

What does wait time mean? well for me it is excess time for my brain to churn up senarios, possibilities, worries, hope, crazy thoughts... etc. I am able to keep busy by surfing the internet, butt then I am also bored of TV. so what to do to pass the time? POGO.com has my vote. Word whomp and a few other favorites.

Oh.. bloatedness is abundant. I am pushing the water and also drinking gatorade. I hope for NO OHSS. google that if you want to know what it is. OUCH is all I can say.

DH and I were invited to a halloween party, but man I can't get myself to get up and shower and my belly looks 5 months pg at this point from the bloating so I think I will skip that party and just send DH and tell him to tell them I am working. YIKES> I hate that, but I hate missing the party. I won't be much of a party girl in pain so I will lay in bed all night and catch up on my TIVO'd shows. Desperate Housewives and Lost.

Kelly.. congrats on your US news.

Blessings to all.

Don't forget to turn back those clocks in the USA.

divide embies divide.

Friday, October 28, 2005

well.... from 12 follies we sure got a basket full of surprises...

not sure how many are mature, but I woke up from the best retrieval yet... NOPE< I DID NOT WAKE UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RETRIEVAL FOR A CHANGE.

a nice basket full of 20 eggs retrieved. I could not believe it... 12 follies and some lagging brought us 20 eggs? WOOOHOOOO

Now the long 24 hour wait.... fertilization call comes tomorrow around 12 pm.

I did have to get a benedry shot due to hives from either the anesthesia or the antibiotic by IV, but that was fine because I slept from 12 pm to 6 pm tonight.

I am so pleased. The process at this new clinic was fabulous. The staff and all were terrific. I don't even remember talking to the doc today. I got a shnot in the IV as soon as I got on the retrieval table and then 15 second later, I don't remember a thing. Thank goodness. I woke up to them reminding me to take a few deep breaths, but then I slept off and on in recovery.

Lets go embies... GO EMBIES GO.

oh.. for one nice surprise for DH.. he and I get to have intercourse the night before transfer which will be either Monday transfer or Wedneday day 5 transfer.
++++++++++++ I will update when they call tomorrow to tell us how many embies we have.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

1 little, 2 little, 3 little follies... keep singing

up to 12 little follies.....well, yup.. 12 follies ready to go and a few laggers ... that is for retrieval tomorrow(friday) am. we go the go ahead for trigger last night at 10:15 am and then retrieval is set for tomorrow at 9:45 am. YEAH.

I have most of the follies growing on the left side and that explain the reason my left side feels so heavy and sore. LOL

I am nervous, but I feel good about Dr. A's office and procedures. I had a friend tell me to not worry about being awake for retrieval at all. They give good drugs. Ahhhhhh

You would think that after 4 other fresh retrievals that I would not be one bit nervous, but I am. Chance is hard. But I have to put my faith in the clinic and the wonderful staff and Dr. A himself to bring us a good count of follies aspirated to bring a good number of eggs gathered. I pray for great quality and great fertilization. I pray that DH produces "HIS" good sample tomorrow!

I am so nervous. I am excited, I am sore, I am filled with JOY that this is possible.

Monday, October 24, 2005

churning is right on....

today I gave my most precious blood at 7:40 am. I then took a 1/2 day of vacation to fit in my first US scan. That US scan proved the real churning of follies in my belly.

Right ovary is producing 4 or 5 measurable follies between 12mm and 16 mm. I saw lots more smaller than that. Maybe some 10's and 8's lagging behind on the right side.

Oh then he went to the left side... YOUCH.. he had to push and then pull towards him to get the ovary in sight. He is so kind and asked if I was doing ok! Well, doc sure, It hurts, but if you get some good news to give me it is well worth the pain. LOL

The left side has brought us about 8 measurable follies. 12mm -16 mm's each. BUT behind those follies are about 8 more that are 8mm-12mm's in size so I am really churning them around.

My E2 level after 7 full days of stims was a nice 1700.

My lining is a nice pillow of 10 mm thick. I am to do the rest of my viagra suppositories tonight and into tomorrow AM. BTW, those thing are not bad at all. They leave a little residue like most vaginal suppositories, but I do believe that between the viagra and the acupuncture that I am doing, My lining has grown a nice size. I asked Dr. A what size lining he is shooting for and he remarked that a 10 is great and it could be a 11-12 mm by time we transfer. YEAH!

I am to do my 300iu of follistim pen tonight, 1 vial of repronex, dexamethasone and folic acid with PNV's. Then 5u of lupron in the AM, 300iu of Follistim in the PM tomorrow night but no repronex. Wednesday AM 5 u if lupron and then I go back in at 1 pm for b/w and US scan again. I asked Dr. A what he thought my schedule will be and it looks like we would possibly trigger Wednesday night and then retrieve Friday morning. Transfer will most likely be a 3 day again. Fine with me. I feel better having our babies back inside me instead of leaving them to grow in the lab.... Although I root them on for freezing if they are in the lab.

I am overall very pleased with this cycle. I am feeling the pain in the back by the kidneys from my ovaries working and churning up a nice respectable number of follies. I am feeling good today because I went into acupuncture and got a full work over for balance. Thanks Doc. And thanks to Kelly for listening to my hormonal blubbering self. I had a little tiff over the stims meds today not being covered, but I will make it through it for the rest of the cycle.

You know what I miss this cycle of all? My DH being involved. He has no duties yet in this cycle. Why? Well in previous cycles he had to give me my IM shots of Pergonal in the hips each day. Well this cycle he does not have to do that because the Repronex is a Sub q shot so I do both the follistim pen and the repronex shot myself. LOL

Last night's shot was done in the bathroom stall at my work. I had to. I was working a 5-11 pm shift after the day job and brought my cooler with my meds in them and then took them to the bathroom stall to do . Luckily nobody walked in while I was doing them. I did rush the shots a little and bled, but that only lasted a few minutes.

Today is good. Cheers to some nice follies on Wednesday and hopefully a trigger shot in the PM Wed night and then tentative retrieval on Friday day and transfer on Monday day. YEAH. PRAYERS that this all falls into place.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

churn babies churn...

the ovaries are sure churning with activity. YEAH.

b/w is at 7:40 am and then first follie US scan *YEAH< date with mr dildo cam* tomorrow at 1:40 pm.

go follies go.

Friday, October 21, 2005


or just lack of contact making me feel this way?

I know I can't compare my cycles between two different doctors, but I will say that I am still trying to get use to the idea that the monitoring between the two clinics is so different and I was so spoiled to so many US's in my first 4 IVF cycles from the previous clinic that it is hard to keep attached to this cycle so far.

I have yet to have a follicle check on my ovaries and I am on day 5 of follistim and day 2 of repronex. I do go in Monday at 1:40 pm to get my scan from the RE himself. YEAH. I go in Monday at 7:40 am for b/w to check my E2 levels and then at 1:40 to go in and check the follies by scan. I am just scared I guess. Scared of the possiblity that I have no follies or little follies growing.

Detached? well, I guess that might all change on Monday at the US. I have to keep reminding myself that this RE is a good one and he knows what he is doing, but the doubt always seems to interject into my mind that he does not "know" how "I" respond to stims. We have done one cycle with this clinic, but it was a frozen transfer cycle that ended in a chemical pregnancy in June/July of this year. I have to stop and look around me knowing that this new clinic and the staff are so very wonderful, knowledgeble too. I was so accustomed to having the staff support me at the other clinic that I only saw that RE(himself) 3 times in my IVF cycle up to the beta. First was the consult, second was retrieval and third was transfer. Whereas I see the doc at almost every appointment I have been to there, even if it is just passing him in the hallway on my way to give blood. HA. I love it.

I was on the way to work today and had a cough hit me. I coughed and then immediately wenched in a little bit of pain. It was a good thing though. You ask why? Well, that pain was from the pelvic region and it was a good sign that my ovaries are tender and filling up with at least a few follies. hehe. I can say that after having done 4 fresh cycles, I can feel and tell what my body is doing .. meaning, it IS ramping up on the follistim and repronex, but I just wonder now many follies. I know, I know.. quality over quantity, but heck I can't stand the wait. AHAHAHA

Today is DH's 41st b-day. Happy Birthday Sweetie. I hope you pick a good restaurant we can go out to dinner to. I know I have this inner feeling you will say "Chevy's" but hey, I am cool with that. I am up for a nice mexican trio enchalada plate. Although, I will have to pass on the NICE HOUSE MARGARITA since we are in the depths of our cycle. LOL I have to remind him about the beer too. oh joy, I get to make the birthday boy not so happy with not being able to drink a brew or two. Sorry dear, but I need your swimmers in tip top shape. hehe.

Ok, I am starting to really think about our 15th wedding anniversary next September. Why think about it now? Well, I told DH I wanted to go to Las Vegas and renew our wedding vows. He agreed and now it is time for me to start planning on the money and travel. I work for a travel company so I will see what they say about how far in advance I should book it. YEAH. VEGAS BABY, HERE WE COME. LOL. I know, I might just be planning way too far in advance, but I have to. I have to make sure we can go celebrate and I hope it is with our first born child in arms too.

Ok, did I put you to sleep yet? if so, Sorry. Just had lost to jot down.

Sorrry our Cardiac Cardinals did not bring the Championship to our house one last time before they tear it down.
Better luck next year in the New Bush Stadium

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

well well well.... hot flash, hot flash hot flash

I will get rid of these hot flashes in a few days time finally. Why, you ask? Well, I am on day 2 of Follistim for this cycle and that means that my E2(estrogen) levels are slowly climbing up. YEAH. Thus it will replenish my body with the much needed hormones that I have been stripped of from the dreaded LOOPY LUPRON. Day 2 of follistim was not bad at all. Yesterday's first shot was a little stingy(is that even a word?). I injected it when it was still a little cold and not at room temp. Well today's shot was much better. I left it sit out while I ate dinner with DH and that seemed to take the sting away from the shot.

Last night I did my shot in my car before I worked my 5-11 shift of overtime in the call center. I worked all day and then left to go to the other building and decided to do my shot in my car instead of the bathroom in the building. LOL Tonights shot was done in the comfort of my own house. Nice. But tomorrow nights shot will be done in the car again between buildings and shifts. hehe... What a story I get to tell my kid one day.

I am suppose to have a yard sale this weekend over at my sisters house but I don't want to haul all my stuff over there and then back if I don't sell it. Ugh. What to do? I need the extra cash to put towards the thought of having embies to freeze. I think the cost for that is 2000.00 and 2 or 3 hundred towards that from the profit of a yard sale would be helpful.

Well, I got no news from my BIL to see if he could get my speeding ticket fixed so I had to finally break down and call a lawyer traffic ticket firm. I hired a firm that is on Manchester in the City. I have heard good things and let me tell you the lawyer fee was only 40.00 comparned to T L C's 90.00 and 183.00 up front for court costs and ticket amendments costs. NO WAY.. they wanted money up front for something they had not done yet? not. so this other lawyer will go with my 40.00 payment for their services and then go to court and have the moving violation hopefully knocked down to a non-moving violation and then the cost will most likely be 150.0 or so for that and court costs. Crossing fingers that it is not more expensive than that. LOL Oh.. that gives me more reason to have that yard sale then. LOL

OK, off to eat a Tums(food day was great at work today for Boss's Week celebration).

night to you all and Cheers for some good follicle growth to happen in the next 4-5 days.


Sunday, October 16, 2005

Gotta love this weather.

Oh I am basking in the wonderful chilled house of ours this AM. I love it, open windows, and so chilly that the windo fans are turned off at bed time. Yeah.

I wish I were camping right now and out enjoying the turning and falling leaves of Fall time. I love cool weather. I love the crisp clean air in the early morning when I go to let the dogs out. Dew on the rails of the deck and nice wood fireplace smell in the air. Ahhhhh, I love Fall.

Speaking of Fall, do you have a winter wardrobe? I don't. I am hot blooded and need a fan on most of the year. I dress in short sleeves all year around and will then just add a sweater if I feel cold or a jacket if outside. I can't stand having a warm shirt on that I can't take down a layer. I often wear a ss t-shirt then a larger button up shirt on top of that, but I can't stand wearing things like turtle necks if I am not outside for a long period of time. Ice Skating I will wear them or when we do camp and are outside at the fire, but even then I rather put on a t-shirt, sweatshirt and then a coat in layers so when I do feel warm I can take down those layers. LOL How do you deal with your wardrobe?

Saturday, October 15, 2005

oh my ... good mood to a bad mood.

today was a very good day for the most part. A friend got her + from a donor embie cycle yesterday, I am very happy for her, then today I had a good morning and went to a few yard sales, went to get new eye glass lenses, then went to the great support group meeting by Dr. Jan DeMasters.

I left there, went to Schnuck's and StL. Bread Co to get items for tomorrows breakfast... then headed home. I got DH to go to K mart with me to get a few things and then BOOM, It hit me and hit me hard. A total 180 degree turn of my mood. I had a MAJOR hot flash while in Kmart with DH and I had to call him on his cell hpone and ask him to meet me and hurry up. I was not feeling well at all. I felt as though I had been dehydrated and started feeling heevish... (is that even a word?)

We headed home, ate dinner and now I feel better, but not 100%. I really wonder if this Lupron is doing this to me or did I just catch a nasty germ in the air that made me feel yucky for a few hours? I feel as though I could lay down and just lay there for 10 hours even without sleeping because I feel exhausted.

I am drinking my water.....I am resting as much as possible and I get to add in stimmulants on Monday!!! YIPPEEE.
Come on Ovaries, pay well for mommy and daddy.

Today was a good day, I blame all the bad things on the lupron! ahahahahaha

Cheers to a good day tomorrow: Although, I have to work 3-11 pm. Wow.

Cheers to some good powerball #'s too. hehe

Friday, October 14, 2005

ALL CLEAR (echo's down the train tracks)

train tracks that are the rollercoaster ride of my life.

ALL CLEAR is the equal to a green light to start stims on Monday the 17th for our IVF cycle. I have been on lupron since the 5th and AF is peeking her head in. I went in yesterday AM for my b/w and US for baseline. I am all clear. NO PESKY cysts. YEAH.

So, I walked in for my b/w and the nurse said "We have a few goody bags for you here" well those 3 bags contained my needles, Follistim Pen case, needles for the Pen, then a goody bag of Follistim, Repronex, Ovidril trigger shot, and some PIO. YEAH. I felt like I was trick-or-treating! That goody bag was a bag of GOLD if you ask me. Compliments of the INCIID the HEART scholarship program. So far this has been a small amount invested money wise.. 525.00 for anesthesia paid 2 weeks ago. about 320.00 for the Viagra suppositories and antibiotics for the retrieval and some Zanex(sp?). Then in hopes that we are blessed enough and have some embies to freeze this cycle.... that might cost us a bit. 2000.00 or more? not sure on that but I need to ask them just in case.

Minimal costs invested, but lot whole lot of EMOTIONS. I am scared. I am anxious, I am hoping and praying hard, I am , I am..... I am..... I want this cycle to work, I would love to be pregnant and share that with DH. I pray and ask God to bless us to get pregnant with a singleton and I sure hope that we are Blessed with that wish. I can't do twins due to history of miscarrying 2 different sets of twins from IVF's. I hope and pray we can get one to implant so my uterus can handle the stretching and not have the subchorionic bleeds as I did with the twin pgcy's. I hope and pray I can get pg and then enjoy being pregnant.

I took my friends advice and started Acupuncture this cycle. I went last night and really really enjoyed meeting the Doc. She is a chiropractor/acupuncturist. She went over my history and was very impressed I knew so much. She asked me if I was considering going into the medical field. I said Yes, I was. I said I would go to nursing school if I could afford it. But anyway.. she focused on my ovaries, uterine region, collar bones for stress, sinus region for stress and sinus pressure, then my head to touch on regions on my neck and back. I go back next Tuesday night and will also ask for an adjustment on my back. I can't wait. She told me not to expect to feel MAGIC when I walked out of there, but more of a feeling of a Balance in my body. I swear to you, after doing my deep breathing while doing the acupuncture, I was feeling so relaxed like I had just slept for 12 hours straight. I loved it. I am focusing on my blood flow through my body. Muscles working on relaxing, becoming whole again and feeling balanced and not out of whack. I like this. I wish I had tried it previous to now, but I am so glad Kelly referred me to the Doc's office.

I miss bloggin', I miss being able to come home and sit down and type out what I am thinking. I will work on at least blogging into an email to myself and post it quickly before I get home and go to bed after the 14.5 hours I have been working the last few weeks.

Oh, did I tell you about the great ticket I got? NO, not a F*cking concert ticket either... A nasty speeding ticket in Rock Hill MO. Jerk for a COP said I was doing 43 in a 30, but was going 5 miles an hour faster than the car in front of me. HELLO?! If I was going that fast and the guy in front of me was going 5 miles an hour Slower than me... duh, I would have hit the guy. Dumbass of a Cop he was. I want to fight it in court, but I can't afford to have the insurance get ahold of the ticket. Why you ask? Well, 3 things... My car accident in Dec '04 and DH's accident this past week. UGH. I have to go this week to get it fixed. I hope I can find a good ticket Lawyer. Court is the 24th and I have totally put this off since I have been working so much. Dang. OUCH on the cost too. OUCH. Me and my 50 lb foot will lay off the gas pedal more now. LOL

Ok, I hope you are are doing well in cyber land. Off to go browse the internet some and catch up.

GO CARDINALS. I have not given up on you and won't. I hope the FAT lady does not SING for us this year and allow us to bask in the shadow of that World Series Trophy.

damn, I miss this place.

so much so that I have been left speechless. LOL

No, I have lots to update, but will do so later tonight... tune in!

Friday, October 07, 2005

I miss the internet...loopy on lupron

Gosh.. how crazy is that? I am lost without being able to visit my regular sites on the internet.. with working these long crazy hours I am stuck without access to YOU all. LOL

Day 3 of lupron... going camping... I have to work Sunday afternoon after camping, but at least I get to get away for a few days. Adults only weekend! YEAH.

Blessings to you all. Prayers to everyone.

CHeers until next week.

I am alive, I am here, just not here on this page as much as I want to be.

Can't wait until Next Wednesday's LOST episode.

off to go smell up my clothes of a nice camp fire and a margarita or two. yum

Saturday, October 01, 2005

did you miss me? I missed you all and the internet

well, I am done with 3 straight weeks of working 68-70 hours each. I am now only going to work Sunday nights 3-11, Monday nights 5-11 and Wednesday nights 5-11. I will still pull some nice OT since I work 8:30-4:30 M-F at the day part of the job, but as long as they are offering the OT I am taking it up to the retrieval week of our cycle. I will take that week off of the night part of the job for OT so I can focus on the retrieval and xfer the week starting the 28th of Oct!!!

I start lupron this Wednesday AM, I am still on bcp's and will be until the 9th. I am going to do follistim, repronex, viagra suppositories, dexamthasone and viatmins in the stim phase. I will then do PIO shots and E2/p4 suppositories in the 2ww. FUN.

I was feeling very very numb to this cycle, but for some reason today I have been given a boost in the good feelings department. I think it is because I saw several mom's that were formerly in the IF support group here in town. We walked for Natalie on the SLU campus here in St. Louis for cancer research. Natalie is an inspiration, battling breast cancer, she hugged me and told me she had a great feeling for DH and I with this IVF cycle. She inpires me to keep my hope no matter what we are faced with. Amazing. I am praying hard for her to get good news that her cancer is shrinking even more when her next visit comes along. It was so good to see Natalie, Lisa, Vicki, and Michele. I love you all. You remind me that my goal is to become a parent in all this. You all showed me that again today how strong that goal is now.

I miss browsing the internet. I miss reading all your blogs and updates online. I miss my cycle buds. YEAH.. It is finally OCTOBER.

Lets see, this month entails..... sadly 2 anniversaries of the losses of both sets of twins we miscarried. First anniv of the frist set of twins is on the 7th, that was from IVF#2 loss in 2002. Second loss of twins was on the 10th in 2003. I miss my angels. On a better note, we are camping next weekend(Adults only weekend). DH's 41st bday on the 21st. Oh and lets not forget.... OUR IVF cycle. Transfer might possibly be on HALLOWEEN hehe.. Thanks Vicki... that is a good day for a transfer.

Oh, btw, GO CARDINALS.............WE ARE THE CARDINAL NATION.............. GO CARDINALS. Tomorrow is the last regular home game in BUSH stadium ever. Sad, but I can't wait to go to the new ball park that is already 1/3 of the way done. We went to the game today and sat in the bleechers and had a blast.