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Friday, September 07, 2007

On the fly (looking for anwers from you moms/dads out there)

Do you ever book yourself crazy busy with things to do when there are big events coming up in life? Well that is what has been happening for me lately. Babysitting here and there for friends and now again for family, weddings, friends hosting home interiors parties or candle parties and to boot - meeting with the lawyer about the adoption process. I tend to overbook myself when times in our life are already busy with anticipation of a big events that will hopefully happen. I don't mind busy days, but I get so ramped up with things that I don't sleep.

Being busy is good to an extent for me, but sometimes exhausting. I know, you might say that exhaustion won't compare for when we have a baby in the house, right? How tired should I expect to be? I have read baby's birth to 18 month books or baby's first year books, but from you experienced mom's/dad's out there, what should I expect in the way of sleep? I know, every baby is different, but will I get 2 hours here, 3 here? How long did you typically go between waking up to feed, diaper etc for the baby to geting back to sleep?

Tell me something about when you became a new mom/dad that nobody warned you about. Something that came of a surprise (either good or bad) that you will always pass onto new mom's as advice if they ask?!


twolinesonastick said...

I was lucky with sleep. In the first week or two we would put Bailey down around 11 pm or midgnight. She slept in about 2-4 hour stretches. We were up for the day around 10 or 11 a.m. In the beginning she took much longer to get to sleep. Now we have a bedtime routine and then just lay her in bed, and she goes to sleep on her own!

What I wish I had known...

when the baby cries, it rips your heart out and you will do ANYTHING to make it better.

I have learned never to say "never" since being a mom. Like all those things I would "never" do with my kid? Yep, we do them! So really just learning to be flexible and go with the flow.

Breastfeeding is hard, and for me a good support group was critical.

Even little baby poop STINKS despite what people tell you :)

Other people/moms/old ladies at the store are always nosy and always have advice. Ignore them! Go with your gut feeling on what's right for your baby.

And it goes by so fast- I know everyone always says that- but it really does. That has been the biggest shock for me. It feels like yesterday that I was pregnant, yet now I have a chubby 4.5 month old baby!

Mich said...

If I remember correctly, MAM slept 2-3 hours at a time, so we'd put her down around 11pm or so, and she'd sleep til 2am. We NEVER turned the lights on during a feeding, and kept her in her room, kept everything quiet...and it became a fairly "quick" feeding, we'd change the diaper, feed her, and then hold her til she went to sleep...so I'd be back asleep by say, 3pm. Then she'd be up at about 6am, so Daddy would do that feeding before going to work, Then she'd go back down and be up for the day around 9am. (eventually sleeping from about 8pm-6am straight through, then a morning nap from 9-11, an afternoon nap from 1-3pm by about 5-6 months)

Don't freak out the first time YOU sleep through the night and go running into the baby's room (the thought SIDS! SIDS! SIDS! was ever-present in my mind)..to find her fast asleep.

Since MAM's our only, while I was tired, it wasn't awful, because I was home with her for the first 7 months, I could sleep when she slept. I think baby #2, should we go for it, would kick my butt because I'd also be keeping up with MAM!

Advice wise, I agree with the above, it goes by so fast--enjoy it. It's not all booties and good smelling lotion, but it IS special.

Also, we totally used generic diapers and formula (Sam's club) and saved a ton of cash--you might consider trying them out! (MAM's never been one to blow out a diaper, so we had no problems with any diapers, not always the case though)

Mutha said...

Let's talk in person. There's so much to go over. How about when you come by for the crib?

Anonymous said...

The best advice I ever got was from our doctor: You alone will know this child better than anyone in the world, and you alone will know what they need the best and what is right for them. It's hard to imagine, but you will just KNOW that child in a way that is just magical!

As far as sleep, the first 8 weeks was the hardest, every few hours, but then it got a lot easier quickly.

What I wish I knew? If the baby is crying and you can't console them, let someone else try. Or put them down...sometimes C was just tired of being held/rocked/bounced and just wanted to be still!
Laura (G1)

petunia said...

From the time the baby is tiny run the vaccuum, watch tv, play the radio. We brought J home and the foster mom had done all these things and gave us that advice - this baby can sleep anywhere, anytime. She slept through a bluegrass (loud) concert when she was 5 months...She has slept 6-8 hours at night from the time she was a few weeks old. There was that first month or two when she would wake up early and was fussy and I remember sitting and being SO tired I could cry but I kept thinking how happy the tired was and how much I didn't mind it. If DH would have gotten me up at 4 I would have been so mad but this was such a special time even though I was miserable and so tired.
With your dh, you will work out a way. Mine falls asleep on the couch about 9 and I put the baby to sleep. He gets up with her early and I sleep...it works out great.
And even though the poop stinks, I was happy to have a dirty diaper to change, it's funny what you will put up with and deal with when it's your baby.
No one telling you what to expect can prepare you, you just have to live it and learn from the experience....and what a great experience---can't wait for you to have that baby!

petunia said...

I forgot- a good tip the foster mom (a nurse) gave us....for the first 6-10 weeks, if you give the baby a bath just before bed it may make him/her cry but it will help them sleep....and it really did. She would cry at the bath but she'd wear herself out and the warm water would relax her---she'd take a bottle and fall right to sleep.

tubelessstl said...

Thank you to everyone for our great comments. I am going to take the future one day at a time once we have a baby at home. I know each baby will produce their own experience, but I love hearing how you all did it and what was a life saver for your situation or best product etc... Keep the stories coming.

JUST A MOM said...

I babysat for so many years... I figured it was just like haveing your own.............. no way 24/7 and total responsablity is so different... hang in there,,, have you ever thought of foster/adopt

Nice to meet you