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Sunday, August 21, 2011

Visits with her birthfamily

Ahhhhh, what a great time we had last night. Scenario ...we had been texting all week long with J's birthfamily and the subject of meeting up in person came up and they asked us to meet them Saturday night for dinner. We set a date night at CiCi's pizza and when we arrived, we found all of them standing out in front of the store. Oh my gosh. Tummy Mommy H was there and she had her hair up in a dual cornrow(like a outward french braid) and so did J's birthsister, B! They looked like twins. B has grown so so much since we saw her in person the last time. Heck, she is growing into a near teenager now and her height is soaring up there. J's Birthgrandma M is just as beautiful as ever with her long flowing brown hair and smile. Then there is Little man A, he is not so little anymore. He was just over 4 when J was born and we have only seen him a handful of times up until J's 2nd Bday. So to see them all standing there, in great health (tall and skinny!) was such a blessing.

They all gave us huge hugs and especially J! She gave them hugs right back as if she had just seen them yesterday.

We proceeded inside and enjoyed nearly 3 hours of dinner and chatting time and we gave the kids some change to play the game machines. While at the table we were able to catch up and see how life is treating everyone. H is a cook at a local diner .. She had told us she always wanted to go to culinary school, but she said she was blessed to have gotten this job and LOVES LOVES cooking the breakfast and lunch crowds. M is cleaning apartments still, she wishes she can find something else, but it works really well with the fact that the B & A get off the bus right there at the house and M can just walk out the door to bring them inside.

I wanted so badly (and plan on in the future) asking them if we could bring B & A into the City and have a huge play date with J. I just didn't ask today. I didn't want to put any pressure on our enjoyable evening. I wanted to enjoy looking at their beautiful faces and be so thankful we got to see them in person. It had been nearly 2 years since we saw them in person and only had text messaging as our means of contact sporadically through these last 2 years. I don't want to push any buttons and cause further distance between contact. I did ask B if she needs more paper, envelopes and stamps so she can send J more letters, pictures, drawings etc and she said YES. So this week I will do that and send a box of goodies down to them.

I had missed them so much, but having talked to J's birthmother M, we knew we needed to let them contact flow with H's comfort. And thanks to our agency's Social Worker, we learned it is best to back off and not put so much pressure on the birthmother/family to have numerous visits. I think the visits we have, although far between, make us appreciate the situation and love we have with them even more. It personifies the LOVE we have for each other and respect too.

We gave H a photo book and more pictures. I told her we will for sure send more at her birthday and along with a letter or two. I want to let them see how big she is and how smart she is and how she is growing up to be such a beautiful "Diva" , love of our lives.

When we left, we stood around in the parking lot giving hugs and more hugs. I loved it. We did get some pictures. I'll have to get them printed.

Thank you Lord above for letting us have contact with her birthfamily. What a love to share and what a blessing to have in our lives.

Oh, I did ask her birthmother for a family tree history so maybe we can see that come our way in the next few snail mail mailings.

1 comment:

Doria said...

Awes thats awesome! Good for you guys. A blessing indeedy! good for you for making sure they are in each others lives! :)